A song split many ways

Here's what i should have said yesterday..

Not Alone is a sort of non-discriminatory song.
One melody, one text, one voice, a thousand meanings.


To the world it means there's always someone you can relate to and rely on. When you think you're weird or when all the people you met turned their back to you because you were somehow different, and you gave up on friendship or love. When you don't expect it, the moment you stop hoping, there comes someone who proves you wrong, someone who's been through the same things and have been probably looking for you all along.
I can say i've been there in friendship. The friends i met in primary school can no longer be considered my friends. And in one specific case i lost faith in friends and boys at the same time. I still haven't fixed the love part, but it took me three years to find another person i could call a best friend. And what struck me about her was just that we had similar experiences and could talk freely about ANYTHING though we didn't know each other for long.


To Jung Min, Not Alone probably means that though he stands on the stage by himself for the first time in five years, he has his family and friends and brothers back stage. And if i know him at least a tiny little bit, i know he thinks he wouldn't be on that stage if it wasn't for all of them.


To SS501, Hyun Joong, Young Saeng, Kyu Jong, Hyung Jun, it may mean they won't stand alone when their time comes.
It kinda fits. Jung Min is the first one coming back as a solo singer and is leaving a sort of message to the others. He's always been the strong pillar. Solo activities won't change that.


To TripleS it means we can always and forever lean on them. We didn't leave them alone when they parted and when everyone thought they were letting us down. They're not leaving us alone now.
Though Jung Min is the only one on the screen, you can't expect to be only Jung Min, when you've been SS501's Sexy Charisma Park Jung Min since high school.
Watching him was like feeling the essence of the other four. That's the emotion i love the most during his perfomance.
I still cannot believe he's promoting alone, but i know it's not a bad thing. It's for him, to grow up as a person and artist; for them, to come back to us with even more charm and talent and feelings to deliver; and it's for all of us, to love them even more and get even deeper reasons to protect them and support them. 
It can't be a bad thing.


To me, Not Alone is what Jung Min represents in my life, translated into music.
After exactly one year i'm back to the same place where this amazing, constantly stunning journey started from.
Hearing his voice and staring at his smile and witnessing his strength, to relieve my own hardships.
Jung Min has a courage i will never have. The courage of tirelessly trying and testing himself. The courage of overcoming fears. The courage of not taking the easiest way out or the easiest way at all. Ever.
This is just one more reason to admire him and stand in his awe.
Yesterday i read this statement:

"Though we still support each other and talk every day, i try not to meet the other members often because i'm afraid i'd feel dependant."

What?
If i were him i wouldn't sign in a different company, first. And if i was forced to, i'd still run to Hyung Jun every night and get drunk with Leader to forget stress and use Saengie and Kyu as therapists.
There he goes, Sexy Charisma pointing out how irreplaceable and tough he is.
But it's not only this.
As stupid as it may sound, when i listen to his song i feel like he's by my side, like if that song is for me, like if it was written because i needed him to say those things.
He helped me only by stepping into my life. I wrote an entry about this already so i won't delive into this topic. But he did help me a lot and i just feel this song is a gift, to cherish that protection he gave me and relive it whenever he may not be around.


Not Alone is literally a song for everyone and this transpires from every single note and gaze and gesture. 
Probably the most meaningful song i've heard in one year of kpop.
I cried listening to Not Alone, not only because of the awesomeness, but because when i look at him in the eyes - though he's not looking at me - i know holding on last summer, after all SS501 has done for me, was worth it. I'm here now and the tears i shed back then and even earlier are like that scar that doesn't hurt anymore but reminds you that you fell once and stood up again.
When i look at him, in this song more than ever, i feel grateful for everything Park Jung Min is, everything i got from him, even indirectly. And i feel he will always, always be my stronghold, our stronghold as long as we'll let him be and as long as his inhuman strength will keep him standing for all of us. 


Love Ya,
Menu ah