S.T.01

The title is quite essential. 'SS501&Triple S forever as 1'

Some people seem to have forgotten that. The sentence that made us proud for as long as we've been fans. The phrase that in 2 letters and 2 numbers, OUR 2 numbers, describe what is supposed to be an unconditional love.

When everything was fine, when nothing had threatened the 501, we all agreed nothing could tear us apart. Yet, it's easy trusting someone when we're all happy and unbothered.

I've been refusing to talk about this issue until now, though after seeing what other bloggers have been writing i should have probably said something. I mean, my blog is not popular but when my TS friends wrote reassuring words i felt slightly better. Maybe i should have said something to make other TripleS feel better, too.

Anyway i won't even sum up the news itself. I'll simply express my thoughts about what's happening because too much is going on, due to square minded people or simply confused people whose brains were left out of oxygen by fear and therefore have said and done wrong things.

I could tolerate if someone who's been a TS for barely a few months like me loses faith. Though i've never done that. But i guess everyone is different.

Yet, reading of veteran TripleS judging our Leader is upsetting.

Acceptable feelings: fear, craziness, sadness. ABSOLUTELY NOT acceptable feelings: anger toward him and everything related to this. From something wrong nothing right can come.

I just read an article written by a non-TS who talked about the humbleness and care of Hyun Joong. And i'll repeat what i've already said: Triple S who bashed Leader without knowing his reasons and worse, assuming he did what he did for reasons that are SO not like him should dig a hole and bury themselves in shame, because a girl who's not a fan realized what a true Triple S should have never doubted.

That our Leader cares about us and has always put his members and his fans before everything else. All the times i heard you saying 'Omg, Leader looks so tired!' and 'Please, Hyun Joong ssi! Don't cry for us! We don't blame you about anything! We're all so proud of you!'....So what? They were only empty words? Something you said 'cause you were supposed to say that?

Kim Hyun Joong (go back to read my 6th of June post) is the person i'm most proud of and worried about at the same time. And when i read he left DSP i was sad and crazy and scared but because of the vagueness. Because we didn't know (and still don't know) the consequences of his decision. I've never been mad because 'he left the group! Then he's never really cared about it!' or 'How could he do this to us?'

It's his life, his career, his dream. Whether he changed company to have better perspectives or because DSP really didn't want to sign with Kyu again, it's not something we have a say in the matter. Our job is simply to do what we've been doing all along: loving him and the others. Especially if the second reason is true.

As far as i'm concerned Leader will always be Leader in my heart. No matter who he works for. Just like i know SS501 will always be SS501, no matter in which company, as solo singers or as a group.

'Cause they have this bond everyone dreams of in life. A friend who feels like a brother. Well, they all got this luck quadruplicated.

I have considered the possibility of a disbandment, partly to "prepare for the worst" despite how hard i'm rejecting this chance now. Partly because every blog was giving it for granted, therefore i was forced to consider that.

My opinion is simple: i'll be desperate 'cause like i said earlier i haven't known them long enough to let them go yet. My life saviors. But at least i'll have the cold comfort that off stage they'll remain a group, calling each other every day and supporting each other whatever they're doing.

And if the group will go on without Leader, then i expect them not to have Leader anymore 'cause SS501's Leader was, is and will always be Kim Hyun Joong. Only the fact i call him Leader, when i don't call GD or Doojoon or Seungho Leader, is a proof he's the best Leader to me.

And above all i don't want a new member. 'Cause the guys i fell in love with are THESE 5 guys. I could be supportive toward a new member, but he'll always feel like an outsider. Poor thing. XD

One more thing: you all know me as the easy Menu ah. The one who loves WAY too many idols. XD It's true i have other groups i love, like Big Bang. I think they're the only group that could try to overcome my TripleS soul. Yet i'm telling you no matter how much i can worship G-Dragon, no matter their ability to make me laugh just like SS501 do.

Six months ago i fell in love with SS501. And until my brain won't be too messed up, no matter where Leader, Saengie, Kyu, Jung Min ah and Baby will be, no one else will have the slightest chance to get my heart.

So, yeah. I'm smad. Sad and mad about the Triple S who bashed our Leader. They seem to have forgotten that in January, when he went through that mess due to President's bday party, he said we're not supposed to protect them, 'cause it's them who are supposed to protect us.

If you really think he hasn't thought, not even for a second, about how his decision could affect us then go on, take my other groups and go love them. And let these five boys be loved and supported by someone who knows how to do that.

I'm not even sure i said all i wanted to say, but i think the point is pretty clear anyway.

Kim Hyun Joong does what he does because he's sure he wants to do that. He doesn't take decisions lightly. And he pours his heart into it.

I swear to God the day i'll hear 'SS501 are not splitting up' i'll pack and come visit each and every one of you to shout 'HA!' and leave again.

And if the worst happens i'll still come...'cause i'll need to pour out my sadness in a healthy way...which won't be healthy for you.

And there's no planet you'll be able to run to, whatever happens. 'Cause aliens won't let in Kim Hyun Joong's bashers. XD